I Quit Sugar

Hello there.  So this months offering is based around the self styled health guru Sarah Wilson’s “I Quit Sugar”.  I’d like to say upfront that I’m not against the idea of quitting processed sugar per se,  it seems like a particularly good idea to not eat foods with lots of hidden sugar like cereals and canned/packet foods so keep that in mind when I start my cray cray rants.  The rants will generally be focussed on the utter crap that this ninny spouts!!!  After just reading the introduction I was overwhelmed by sadness that I’d just contributed $25 to her accounts so she can continue to take pictures of herself with a bicycle and a Byron Bay calico shopping bag.  I’ll give you a  taster today of some of her pronouncements…..

“I’ve never eaten a krispy kreme donut and ice cream bores me” – (wtf who doesn’t like ice-cream. Losers. That’s who.)

“What started as an experiment soon became a way of life, then a campaign to alert others to the HEALTH DANGERS OF SUGAR”

“This book is about losing weight and getting well”

“Gwyneth Paltrow kindly shared this recipe with me…”

Wanna vomit yet?  I do.  Looks like I’ll lose weight here, by not keeping my dinner down.  Anyway, I’m committed for a month to the cult of Sarah, better buy some malt syrup.

IMG_2390

This is not my diet

Well, you’ve probably worked out by the lack of jaunty posts, this is not the diet for me.  Where’s the hilarity as I make non edible potato rosti?? Where’s the surprise that coconut flour tortillas are awesome?  Where’s the realisation of what I’ve been missing by not drinking nut milk (the answer by the way is absolutely nothing)?

No, apart from being totally depressing the 5:2 diet commits an even greater sin.  It is DULL.

I’ve been pretty crap at sticking to it, there have been some sneaky scarfings on the drive home of the haribo party mix stashed in the central console of the car.  I’ve even eaten the fluff that gets in the bag.  One night I drank a bottle of wine in place of dinner – it’s liquid so not cheating right?

I’ll do the official write up this weekend….but don’t hold your breath!  Next month is going to be much more interesting as I explore the idiot writings of Sarah “I quit sugar but not really” Wilson.